Have you ever paused to consider what truly drives your decisions? What pushes you along your chosen path?
For years, my answer was simple: the pursuit of success. I believed that once I’d achieved ‘success’—however I defined it—happiness would naturally follow. When I finally had all those markers of achievement, I imagined myself sitting back with a contented sigh, basking in the happiness my accomplishments had brought.
Except it never quite worked out that way.
The cruel irony became clear: the more ‘successful’ I became, the more happiness slipped through my fingers, leaving me increasingly miserable and discontent.
Like the animated villain Megamind, who finds his ultimate victory oddly hollow, I had it backwards. It isn’t the pursuit of success that leads to happiness—it’s the pursuit of happiness that leads to success.
I know what you’re thinking, because I initially thought it too: how can you find happiness without first experiencing success?
It seems counterintuitive, challenging everything we’ve been taught through school, university and our careers. If you’ve achieved success but happiness remains elusive, surely you’re simply not successful enough yet.
Try harder!
All the research points to happier people earning higher incomes, engaging more in their communities, and enjoying more fulfilling relationships and marriages. Kind of figures, right? Surely all that success is what makes you happy?
Well, the evidence suggests otherwise. Research—and my own experience—reveals that you can work endless hours, train relentlessly, study round the clock, earn millions and climb to the top of your field, yet it simply won’t be enough. Happiness must come first.
The evidence is compelling. In 2005, researchers Lyubormirsky, Diener and King published a paper synthesising 225 studies with over 275,000 participants. Their conclusion? Happiness genuinely precedes success.
Studies show that happiness and positive emotional states actually precede success-invoking behaviours. Happy people demonstrate increased social interaction, ambitious goal-setting, prosocial activity, resilience, healthy living habits, creativity, and enhanced problem-solving abilities.
They’re more likely to seek out others, be adventurous and open, show empathy, experience greater relationship closeness, engage in physical activity, and enjoy higher energy levels than their less-happy counterparts. They’re also more inclined toward voluntary and charitable activities.
The physiological evidence is equally compelling, too. Happy people demonstrate higher pain thresholds, greater resilience in stressful situations, more positive approaches to treatments for serious illnesses, and greater willingness to follow prescribed treatment regimens.
And it doesn’t end there: laboratory studies consistently show that happy people display more originality and creativity in problem-solving and task activities.
All this evidence tells me we’ve got it backwards: our focus shouldn’t be on achieving success to become happy, but on being happy to achieve success. Instead of doing things in order to experience happiness, we should do things because we’re already happy.
Imagine what your life might look like with this perspective shift. Rather extraordinary, isn’t it?
So how can you begin discovering happiness for its own sake, not as a byproduct of achievement?
Start by appreciating what you already have. Take a piece of paper and note down everything you’re grateful for. Then, over the next week, spend five minutes each evening writing down three things from your day for which you feel truly grateful.
It might sound simplistic, but give it a try. You’ll be astonished at how such a small practice can transform your outlook—and potentially set you on the path to the success you’ve been chasing all along.
