‘Analysis Paralysis’—a phrase that captures that trap we all fall into—the ‘over-thinking-it’ trap.
Let’s be clear: goals are just dreams unless you do something to make them happen. Eventually, dreams that stay dreams become torture. Taking action is key to achieving your goals and living your real life. But what action? What if it doesn’t work? What if you end up flat on your face? What will people think?
With these questions buzzing around your brain—all that analysis and the fear of failure it induces—paralysis sets in and you do nothing. When you do nothing, nothing happens. Goals don’t become reality. Dreams stay dreams. You remain trapped in an existence that’s merely an interpretation of who you really are.
That, let’s be honest, sucks.
Here’s an uncomfortable truth: failure is not something to be feared, but something to be welcomed, whatever your over-thinking may be screaming in your ear.
I’ve lost count of coaching clients who’ve told me, “Failure is simply not an option.”
I understand. You feel like the eyes of the world are on you. Watching. Waiting for you to crash and burn. Maybe even hoping for it.
Under that scrutiny, you must make no mistakes—your adventure must be perfect. Failure is not an option.
Only, failure is an option (not least because no adventure can ever be perfect, otherwise it’s not an adventure).
“But, Andy, I’ve got too much riding on this to risk failure!”
I do understand. What you’re creating—your real life—is intertwined with your identity. You daren’t risk failure because, if your adventure fails, so do you.
But let’s flip that. Because your life and the adventure it holds are one and the same, you daren’t not risk failure.
When failure is not an option, you play it safe. When you play it safe, you eliminate risk—which means you compromise. When you compromise, you live a life that falls short of all it was meant to be.
“OK, but I can’t fail—this is my last chance.”
Why is this your last chance? There’s no age limit or finite number of ‘chances’ attached to the adventure into your real life. The only person limiting your chances is you.
I don’t care if you’re 95 or if this is your 153rd attempt—this is not your last chance, unless you choose to make it so.
“But if I fail, it means my sense of what my life should be is wrong.”
No! Failure doesn’t mean your picture of the real you is wrong. All failure means is that the path you took didn’t lead where you thought it would. And wherever that path did take you, there’s always a way forward.
“Fine, but I’m afraid of failing.”
Now we’re getting to the crux. Every objection flows out of fear. And the fear of failure—bubbling up from all your over-thinking—will paralyse you.
If you’re scared to fail, you’ll never do anything. And while you may never fail, you’ll never succeed either.
What’s the worst that can happen? Maybe you end up with egg on your face or lose some time and money. That’s about as bad as it gets.
Failure is like a dental appointment—the idea is worse than the reality. So have a go. Take a risk.
Sure, it may not work out. But it just might.
You have too much riding on your adventure not to risk failure. So accept that failure is always an option, and will likely happen many times. Give yourself permission to take risks that, whether they bring success or failure, will open doors to growth and possibilities beyond your wildest dreams.
