There’s a scene in Ice Age 2 that perfectly captures a profound truth about identity.

Manny the mammoth meets Ellie, another mammoth who—remarkably—believes she’s a possum. Yep, Ellie, despite weighing several tonnes and standing three metres tall, is convinced she’s a tiny marsupial. When Manny shows her their identical footprints and shadows, she simply concludes that he must be part possum too.

How can a mammoth be so thoroughly convinced she’s something entirely different?

The answer: other people’s agendas.

Ellie was adopted by possums who raised her according to their needs. Their messages gradually convinced her she was something far removed from reality. Even when faced with irrefutable evidence, she couldn’t accept her true identity.

And so it is with us.

We enter the world with immense potential and passions that, if unleashed, would help us flourish. But from birth, we become part of a story where those around us—friends, family, teachers, colleagues—have agendas for who we should be.

Sometimes these agendas intend harm. Other times they appear well-meaning. Yet the result remains the same: we find ourselves living under the shadow of someone else’s interpretation of our lives.

Gradually, we embrace that interpretation as reality.

Here’s the truth: an interpretation of you is not the real you.

When you live as an interpretation—rather than who you were created to be—you make poor decisions. You believe untruths and end up living a life that simply doesn’t fit.

I know this cost personally, having spent 30 years living as an interpretation before finally seeing clearly.

So how do you avoid this trap?

Well, it takes work. Work to unpack and grasp who you truly are. Through self-understanding, you develop filters that distil from outside influences only what nourishes your authentic growth.

Start by imagining no one is watching. There’s no one to please or judge you. Then ask yourself three essential questions:

First, what do you truly enjoy? Not what you’ve been told you should enjoy, but what genuinely brings you joy?

Second, what strengths lie dormant within you? What abilities have you longed to develop but dismissed as “not you”?

Third, what genuinely motivates you? What matters deeply? What quickens your pulse and ignites your enthusiasm?

When you understand these aspects of yourself, you establish the foundation for your real life—one aligned with who you truly are.

This isn’t about selfishness. Quite the opposite. When you live authentically, you contribute more effectively to the world around you. A mammoth trying to live as a possum fails at both being a mammoth and being a possum.

Think about areas where you might be living as an interpretation:

Your career: Are you pursuing work that others validated, or work that genuinely engages you?

Your relationships: Are you fulfilling others’ expectations, or building connections that reflect your values?

Your use of time: Does your calendar reflect others’ priorities or your own authentic interests?

This journey of self-discovery isn’t simple. We’ve spent years accumulating layers of others’ expectations. Peeling them away takes courage and persistence.

Start with small steps. Notice when you’re making choices to please others rather than express your authentic self. Pay attention to activities that energize rather than drain you. Observe when you feel most alive and most yourself.

The path to your authentic self isn’t found by looking outward for approval but by looking inward for truth.

Life is short. Sometimes too short. Don’t waste it in an existence that isn’t yours. Instead, discover who you really are and step into the life you were made for—the life where, like Ellie eventually did, you embrace your true nature and live with the power and purpose that comes with authenticity.